Here Goes Everything.

Here Goes Everything.

In just a few short days, I’ll be boarding a plane that will take me to Taipei, Taiwan.  From there I will be flying into Bangkok, and thus begins the most terrifying, exhilarating, and quite possibly amazing adventure of my life.

I’m a valley girl through and through. Born in Northridge, went to High School in Woodland Hills, and graduated from USC with a BA in Dramatic Arts and a minor in Communications in May 2014 — the whole 9.  I’ve never been more than a stone’s throw away from my family, and I’ve absolutely never been by myself for more than a few days at a time.  And why would I? I’m terrified of it.

I love my family.  I have awesome friends.  I’m dating the man of my dreams.  I have two fun-loving puppies to play with.  I’m comfortable with the way my life is set up right now….So why am I leaving?

That’s honestly a good question. I’m really nervous.  Like extremely nervous.  I’ve had second thoughts, I’ve prayed on it, I’ve asked my parents for advice.  But on Tuesday night I’ll be walking into LAX, come rain or shine.  I’ve made that commitment, and I’m sticking to it.

I think it’s time I forced myself out of the boundaries of my comfort zone for once.  If I had gone away for college or studied abroad for a semester, maybe I wouldn’t feel like I need this.  But I was too scared to do it back then.  I wasn’t strong enough, I wasn’t confident enough in my comfort zone.

I’ll miss my family more than anything in the world, but I ‘m excited to see how much my sister has grown in the time that I’m gone.  I can’t wait to see how long my mom’s hair is, or what color Mary is dying her hair come next September.  I can’t wait to see how big Marcus’s ears are… jk those things better not get any bigger.

I’ll miss a lot of important moments in my friends’ lives.  I’ll miss out on Indy graduating.  I won’t get to be there for any of Syd’s crazy summer nights. I’ll miss out on the horror/joy/mostly horror of frappy hour at Starbs (sucks to suck lol). But for the first time in my life I feel like my group of friends will absolutely be waiting for me when I get back.  They’ll have stories for me, and I’ll have some for them.  But our friendships are strong enough to stand some time apart, and maybe they will be even stronger for it.

I’ll cry my eyes out every night for at least a week, missing Kam.  And that’s a very optimistic forecast.  But there’s no other man who’s made me feel so alive, or so ready to take on the world.  For the first time in my life I feel like my partner is that fabled safety net that enables you to do scary things without the fear of falling.  I trust him to catch me if I do…I’ve never had that before.  If I didn’t believe we could make it through a tough six months, I wouldn’t be going.  But what’s six hard months in the grand scheme of things, when you find the person who makes it so easy to want to give them the rest of your life?

And those puppies will be just as cute, just as bad in six months as they are now.  Of that, I am completely certain.  Lol.

So on Tuesday night I’m leaving my comfort zone and really experiencing the world for the first time in my life.  And after I’ve finally gotten over the jet-lag and I’m out of tears to cry over how badly I’m missing my loved ones, I’ll celebrate my birthday in Bangkok.  And no matter how hard it will be to spend it away from the people I love most in the entire world, 23 in Thailand is not a bad deal.

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